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Friday, May 1, 2015

Coming out in Canada

We stopped at Tim Horton's after dropping our daughter off at Western University in London, ON one morning in January. I was short about 15 cents for my order. I cancelled the muffin that I did not need and which I thought was on sale.  The server asked if I had a status card. Which never happens in this part of the world. I said, "I don't have one". She began to share that she had recently helped a friend of hers get a status card. I told her that I could get a status card but I chose not to have one. She seemed to think that I was put off by the paperwork, I assured her I was not. I asked why her friend did not have status, "was she adopted out, a lot of people have been adopted out of their communities". She said no, her friend's family came from Manitoba when she was young and then recently she decided to...to...to..her voice trailed off, she did not have the words. I said, "She Came Out". "Yes, that's it", she said.
"Well it can be harder to come out as Native than to come out in the other sense, after all, this is Canada." She paused and then her hand went to her eyes with the napkin she was to give to me. "Oh my god, that's so true...I never thought about it like that." She wiped her tears and pulled her self together. I offered my apologies, "I did not mean to ruin your day", I said. She said it was "Ok". I told her I was Metis Nation, "you know Louis Riel's People", and that is why I did not have a status card. She was pleased that I had shared and she smiled brightly and told me to have a good day. It wasn't until later that I thought about my dark haired server and how people sometimes say "my friend" when they tell stories about themselves.

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